if i could actually make an honest choice what to pursue, i would choose “nothing”. with an option that everyone (including myself) would be terribly pleased with the choice. well, there, before the birth, there was an electronic queue just like everywhere and i accidentally pressed "human", because i was pushed, i wanted to press "stone" but as i said, someone pushed me and the machine printed the ticket "E53" and i had to stay and wait and i felt awkward for making people wait while I would press it right once again, and here started self-deception and self-convinceing, they say, maybe it would not turn out so bad being a human, they say, in there it could be even funny sometimes, and most importantly - quickly: sometimes you have just started and the game is already over, so maybe I'll get lucky, although being a stone is much better, but to go back and to press again could be taken as if i want to keep places in two lines at the same time, anyway, what a mess, okey, E53 and that's it, maybe it will work out lovely, although i know that it won't, then what for am I staying here, if I know that this ticket is to be crumpled up and thrown away and it's better to come the other day, but then E53 was announced from somewhere up there and it was too late to crumple the ticket and I stepped up to the window number 2 and asked, madam, may i be a stone, and she asked back what kind of a ticket i had, well i showed and she was like "but it is not a ticket for a stone" and i said yes, but maybe i still could be a stone, because i was pushed while taking the ticket, and she was like sorry, but i cannot do anything to help you, and i felt so awkward that i said, ok, then let's leave it this way.
and here is what it is. E53.